Mary Ruth Riley
March 12, 1930-July 22, 2022
Mary Ruth Riley, known as ruth, was born in 1930 at home in Alliance, Ohio on a dairy farm to Sadie and Earl Antram. She had one older sister, Elizabeth, and a set of younger twin siblings, Alma and Albert.
Ruth’s chores included helping her father, along with her older sister, to milk many cows by hand. She also helped with gardening, canning, driving the tractor, and cooking. They grew almost all of their food and traded for what they could not grow. This developed a strong work ethic.
Because they had the farm, they were able to help the homeless during the great depression. This is where she developed the desire to help others.
She attended a one room elementary school with 20-24 children in her class. During this time she also learned to play the piano and violin. This is probably why she insisted thather sons learn to play the piano and another instrument.
Ruth attended Muskingum College in Ohio. Her father would sell some cattle to pay for the tuition each semester. Education was very important to her and her family. She came home during the summers and holidays to help on the farm. She graduated in 1952 with a BS in education. She kept in touch with college friends her whole life. Ruth taught in Ohio elementary schools for three years.
When Ruth was 23, she was asked out for a date by George Riley. He had recently returned from the Korean war. They both had gone to the same high school. They courted for a year, and got married August 20, 1955 at Dellroy Presbyterian Church in Delroy, Ohio.
Ruth and George moved to Fort Wayne, Indiana so he could attend College on the G.I. Bill. Ruth taught one year in Indiana. A year later, they were blessed with their first son, Daniel.
After George completed his degree in civil engineering, he took a job with Convair and the family moved to San Diego. This was way out west and far from farm life and relatives. God blessed them with two more sons, David and Jeff.
In 1962, George took a position at Lockheed and they moved to San Jose. Another blessing came when Tim was born.. Ruth spent her time being a stay at home mom raising the “boys in her life”. The sons not only learned the outside chores with Dad. But they also learned the domestic chores from Ruth such as cooking and cleaning.
Ruth and George had been hoping for at least one daughter. She inherited four daughters when her sons got married. The daughters-in-law; Nancy, Maribeth, Marsi, and Cindy; felt blessed to have her in their lives.
When her youngest child went to school, Ruth got her California teaching degree. She was an assistant teacher working with children that needed additional help. She also tutored after school. An example of her creative teaching occurred when she worked with one child that was having reading problems. Mom found out that he loved firetrucks. She brought him books about firetrucks and he learned to read using them. Ruth was a problem solver.
Each summer the family would go on vacations for two weeks. Many years they took road trips and other years they traveled to Ohio where the relatives lived. On the road trips, they sang songs from commercial jingles and the school choir. They also worked together to decide what attractions to stop at along the way. These trips built strong family relationships.
In 1977, George tragically died of a heart attack at the age of 46. It was very sad for Ruth and sons, but she trusted God to provide. She went back to school and learned business administration and got a full time job with a high tech company. She had a can-do attitude about things.
After her sons left home, she rented out a room. One of her renters was Dee Singh. He was a close college friend of Tim and Cindy’s. He stayed with her for 4 years. He was like a fifth son to her.
Ruth and George had planned to go traveling the world after he retired. Her will to travel was stronger than the difficulty of losing her husband. She took 23 tour trips in 18 years. They were in the United States and many other countries including Turkey, South America, Africa, and Australia. She went with family and friends from college or friends developed over the years.
When each grandchild reached 16, she took them on a trip of their choice anywhere in the world as long as they carried the suitcases. Sadly she was not able to take the last two grandchildren on trips due to health concerns.
At age 65, Ruth sold her San Jose house and moved into a modular home in the Adobe Wells park. She wanted to free up more money and time for her travels. She became very involved with a number of social events in the park including dinners and canasta. Canasta was one of her loves. She continued to play canasta both at Adobe Wells and Villa Serena.
At age 86, she sold her modular home and moved to Villa Serena, an active retirement community. She greatly enjoyed being in this community for the last 6 years with the great activities and caring friends and staff. She considered it a second family.
Ruth enjoyed life throughout her years. Besides traveling, she was a very social person, enjoying family and community get-togethers and especially playing games such as canasta, parcheesi, and flinch. Ruth very much enjoyed spending time with her 7 grandchildren: Lily, Katie, Paul, Evan, Alex, Tyesha, and Garrett; Lily’s and Paul’s spouses: Miles and Jessica; and 3 great grandchildren: Mica, Penny, and June. She also enjoyed doing crafts, especially needle work like quilting, cross stitch, and crocheting. She made quilts for all of her sons and grandchildren. She had a special love for doing jigsaw puzzles.
Even though she had good times she also experienced some challenges. But through it all she maintained a positive attitude.
Throughout her life she spent her time and energy trying to impact other lives for the better. This included being a teacher, helping with little league, high school band boosters, volunteering with Friends Outside, and helping with grief counseling for widows.
Throughout her life she had a strong Christian faith. When growing up, her family attended the Presbyterian church. She was active in Grace United Methodist Church in Saratoga and Sunnyvale First United Methodist Church. She was a member of Women’s groups including United Methodist Women (UMW) and Women Circles. In UMW she was in leadership and facilitated Bible Studies. Ruth was involved in the craft group which held holiday fairs each year to raise money to support missions. She usually made a quilt and some needle craft for auction at the fair.
During Ruth’s 80th birthday, she gave advice about life that she wanted others to remember. They were:
Don’t Worry
Don’t cross your bridges too soon and don’t burn them either.
Be confident and self assured, it's a great strength to have.
Take what life hands you good and bad… and don’t dwell on the bad.
Don’t take yourself too seriously.
Take one day at a time.
Ruth will be remembered for her generous and loving heart and deep Christian values. She will be deeply missed. Until we meet again in God’s heavenly kingdom.
I would like to thank all the people who have walked with Ruth through her life and helped her and I am sure she also helped them. This includes her friends and family, those she traveled with, the members of her churches, her friends at Adobe Wells and her friends and the staff at Villa Serena. Her life was so much richer because of you.